Taking the Scenic Route

This is where it starts getting rough.  The sleep deprivation is taking a toll & I am really missing Zach and Zane.  Her blood sugar is getting worse and I am faced with the decision to either formula feed or have an IV put in her to hydrate her and stabilize her blood sugar.  Her ability to nurse is starting to deteriorate because she has no energy and I am constantly either nursing or pumping to try and get up my milk supply and make something for her to syringe feed with to try and gain enough energy to eat effectively. 

One rather amusing note during this time:  When the doctor (young, a few months out of school) came in earlier in the week to announce that it was time for us to consider supplementation, she did so with the obvious expectation for me to just go with it.  When I calmly said absolutely not, she looked at me like I had two heads.  She literally became speechless for a moment.  She said that I could continue to pump to increase my milk supply and they could avoid bottles by doing syringe feeding.  I told her that I would be willing to pump the other breast while feeding and use that to supplement but I was not going to supplement with formula and she would need to find a solution that did not involve formula.  I was told by the rather amused nursing staff that she spend a LOT of time after my pronouncement sitting at the computer researching how to handle the situation.  The nursing staff told me later that her solution was exactly what the doctor I was scheduled to have attend her would do, but it was cool that she spent the time researching the answers for herself.  I was impressed that she took me seriously and cared enough to find a solution. 

Unfortunately, the solution involved putting her on an IV.  The morning of the 26th is when they decided it couldn’t wait any longer.  It was the first time I broke down and cried.  My mom reminded me that this IV might end up saving her years of needles and hospital visits for the allergies that run so heavily in my family (including some members with really bad milk allergies, which is my biggest concern with formula at this point).  The logic center in my brain knew it was the best choice, but it was so hard at the time. 

They managed to get her with the first stick.  Truly amazing considering her size.  The nurse kept apologizing for the tape job (which I was actually oblivious to since I don’t see IVs very often) but they had tried to put a board on her arm but didn’t have anything small enough for her. 

Dawn & Zyg stopped by again on their way back to KC.  The girls were at their paternal grandparents, so they weren’t there.  Dawn brought me a bottle of Fenugreek and a package of instant oatmeal to help with my milk supply.  Seeing her reminded me that the situation could be so much worse.  I stayed with her in the hospital when her middle child was 6-8 months old for her heart surgery.  This pales in comparison to that experience.

In general, the nursing staff was great.  There were a couple of nurses I really connected with.  One was a 50ish lady who was so kind and gentle.  I am wondering if she is the person who’s hand I grabbed in the OR, but I am not sure.  She couldn’t come see me the last day of my stay because she was caring for an infectious mother and couldn’t take the chance with getting Zora or me infected.  She just had such a generous spirit.  Another was one of the night nurses, partially by virtue of me being a night owl and the only awake patient on the floor.  (heck, there were times that Zora and I were the only patients since there weren’t any scheduled c-sections or inductions during the middle part of my stay and nobody happened to go into labor).  She was the one who helped me with the weighing/feeding marathon that last night that I talked about in this entry.

The other nurse I really connected with was one who had the perfect experience to really help me.  She had spent 20 years in the NICU at the large regional medical center (Wesley) and was very knowledgeable about preemies and near term newborns.  Before she worked there she spent years working with a midwife in Maryland and has even worked with Ina May Gaskin.  You could not have asked for somebody so in tune with the struggle I was going through to deal with the interventions of such a medicated birth.  She was the person who initially started the Lactation Consultant position at the hospital, stepping aside when she decided to home school her kids.  What a wealth of knowledge and experience there!  She understood better than anybody why I was grasping so hard onto the few natural things I had left to be able to give my child through the birthing process, especially breastfeeding.  Not only was she supportive of my desire to do a more kangaroo style care (lots of skin to skin contact, specifically laying Zora on my chest after feedings instead of laying her in the bassinet wrapped in blankets), but she was involved in the big study that helped prove the value of that style of newborn care.  It just felt like God put her there just for me…it could not have been more perfect.